I was walking around Whole Foods the other day looking for my favorite overpriced epicurean delights when I noticed a very attractive woman standing by the produce section. At the time I didn’t think much of it, but when a gentleman approached to the side of her and began to talk about vegetables, it hit me like a ton of bricks. He had just been caught; hook, line and sinker, this woman just needed to decide whether he was a keeper or to throw him back. I had just been privy to one of womankind’s long held secrets, the art of personal advertising!

For some reason, evolution has played a cruel trick on men, it has compelled men to be the ones who overtly seek out the female of the species,  all the while it is the female who calls all the shots when it comes to choosing a mate. Just look at this woman in the produce aisle of Whole Foods, she is just waiting for her “actions” to draw in an unsuspecting victim. Wait, let me correct that, he is not unsuspecting, but there must be some chemical blocking agent in his brain that either makes him oblivious to the manipulation or perhaps causes him to not care.  In any event he is drawn in like a moth to a flame. The attractive woman knows at this point she has all the power and the only thing she needs do is decide whether to entice and torment him any longer, or to set him free and search for a better prospect.

Quite often setting him free from her snare of womanly wiles is the most humane act she displays, as once she decides on a suitable male, she will invariably bend him to her will. She holds the power at this point but once the choice is made to keep him, the scales begin to balance out just a bit. Everything taking place after the initial contact begins to balance out and the man starts to regain some manner of control and maybe a bit of dignity if he’s lucky. This occurs as the woman begins to desire the man, and what he may offer in the manner of physical intimacy, protection and possible stability. The longer she keeps him wanting her at this stage while teasing him, the more desires she has that are going unfulfilled.

An attractive woman has power and she knows it, but average women have the same kind of clout though many more men tend to avoid falling into their ambush. The more attractive a man is, the more likely it is that he can shield himself from her manipulations. The reason is that an attractive man may have the same affect on a woman as the attractive woman has on men. Average women and average men are in the majority so there will be many more opportunities for them initiate interactions. Knowing that the next possibility may be just around the corner gives an individual the strength to walk away from a potential relationship very early on, and avoid too much psychological harm. Women seem to realize this much quicker than men and therefore maintain control longer.

So in conclusion, some feel women control the initial interactions, giving up some of that power as the relationship grows. The scales begin to balance out as both parties begin to realize they desire something from the other. But no matter which way you look at it, in the end its not about control or power, its about relationships and how one person ultimately makes the other feel.