I love hearing the phrase “nice guys finish last”, because it’s almost always spoken by the guy that finished last. Nice guys don’t finish last, guys that don’t have the will and determination to give it their all usually are the ones that are at the end of the line. Lets be honest about this, those that can’t hack it need to justify their poor performance, because no one is willing to say that someone merely tried harder than they did or they didn’t care enough to figure out a way to do better at some task. Call yourself a nice guy or call yourself a loser, but in reference to this article, there are pretty much the same.
Now, obviously we are not talking about acts of superior physical challenges, as that would be unfair, since not all objectives or goals are specific for athletic individuals and not all athletes could compete against mentally superior individuals. But we all have the ability to put forth intense effort and resolve, and those who don’t are not necessary ‘nice guys’ or ‘bad guys’, merely guys who didn’t try as hard. Lets assume for this argument that the guys are all pretty similar in terms of overall attractiveness, we can then look at attitude as the irresistible force that will allow one man to succeed in pursuit of a female while another may crash and burn.
One more thing that needs to be taken into consideration is what type of relationship that the female is looking for; as different male attitudes are more desirable, depending on what type of relationship is sought. Women who are not looking for more than a casual fling and may not want anything more than to date several men at a time are usually drawn to the classic bad boy attitude. This brooding mysterious type, whom although may be very attractive, there is usually not much known about him. For the woman who is seeking a long-term relationship and someone to count on, and perhaps looking to start a family, the responsible or ‘nice guy’ is the preferred choice. It’s really not about who is the nice guy or bad boy, but who has the desired mind-set at a specific point in time for a particular female.
Because you are never quite sure at the onset of getting to know someone what their current desires are, its best to be able to transition from bad boy to nice guy and visa versa on the fly. This is imperative if you are not sure what you are actually looking for as well. If you are looking for a specific type of relationship than there is no need to play both ends of the attitude spectrum, just be who you are and wait for the girl who is looking for the same. Be aware that just like a school of fish, nice guys tend to hang out with nice guys and bad boys with bad boys. This is how we have come up with chess clubs and motorcycle gangs. Sometimes it pays to be the lone wolf and roll with it to avoid being thought of in one way or the other. This approach gives you lots of latitude and options.
As for the old adage nice guys finish last; again it all depends on your point of view. If having someone that knows you and loves you despite all your imperfections, and having children who adore you and count on you is considered finishing last; well, then I’d pick being a nice guy each and every time!