Sugardaddie.com Blog

Friends are wonderful, they are usually there when you need them, and they can help you with chores such as landscaping, cleaning out the garage or being a sounding board for career decisions when you are considering a new job. Occasionally they will even loan you money, well, that is if they are exceptionally well-off or just stupid, but the one thing you should never do is take advice from a good friend about affairs of the heart! Don’t do it!

Taking dating advice from a friend is tantamount to going shopping for a puppy with any member of the cast of “Survivor”! You may think it’s a fun idea at first but you know as soon as your back is turned that little mut will probable bite you in the ass! You may as well call Charlie Sheen and ask for his relationship opinions while you’re at it. Friends quite often, but not always, have hidden agendas when it comes to dating and relationships, especially when it’s someone else’s relationship. Here are some types of red flags to be on the alert for:

The friend who tells you to “dump him” or her is the one that really gets under my skin, as not only is this person quick to give their advice, but usually does not take the time to ask the pertinent questions about the situation.  Have you ever noticed that this person always seems to be what you felt, was uncomfortably close to your other half, and perhaps always more than willing to be the third wheel when you go out? Do not be surprised that if you break up your ex gives you a ring telling you that “your friend” still calls them or has even asked him or her out!

We now move onto that friend that listens to the entire situation and tells you that everything is going to be fine and you should be happy no matter what, because you are so special and deserve the best. This is also the same person who believes in puppy heaven and the tooth fairy. Dating and relationships are not easy! They require work and people who are too quick to move away from difficult times merely do not care enough to fight for them, or truly understand the situation. This type of friend may not care as much as they claim, they are simply telling you want they think you want to hear in order to stay in your good graces, while also staying within grasp of free entertainment and an occasional free meal.

The next friend is a bit harder to understand. They are the one that wants no part of the current state of affairs; he or she says they do not want to tell you what to do for the simple reason that if you get back together, anything he or she says will be held against them. OK, so they have a point there, if I tell my friend that his girlfriend is a manipulative tramp or has the intellect of an eggplant, I am treading on thin ice. If they get back together, your observations or comments, (even if they were meant only to bolster a friends spirits) will come back to haunt you. This type of friend has a point, you can’t actually blame them, as you are the one putting them in a difficult situation, but as a friend they should take the risk and stand by your side.

Finally we get to what I like to call the “Better with Beer Goggles Friend” this is the friend who follows you like a Remora fish follows a Shark hoping to pick up the table scraps. Its not that they are the second coming of “Medusa” as people do not turn to stone when they go out in public, its just that they would not be your first choice (second or third for that matter) to flirt with in a well lit environment. This type of friend also has ulterior motives due to the fact that your being single gives them a much better chance of finding someone themselves, even if for just that evening!

In conclusion, I am not saying that all friends offering advice have hidden agendas, but you need to take any advice offered with a grain of salt. Remember you are the one that is having the crisis, not them. It all comes down to what you feel is best for you. There are those friends that would jump in front of bus for you, and there are those that secretly would like to be driving that bus. Ultimately, you make the decisions, some of them will be right while others will be painfully wrong. Only time will tell you if the choice was right, but life is what happens while you’re making other plans!

The term Sugadaddie has been used to describe a relationship that implies a slightly older gentlemen willing to enter into an ongoing relationship with younger attractive ladies in which the man may assist the woman financially.. Of course we all know that there is more often than not a physical element to this plot, but the emotional component has come to mean much more, yet it is quite often overlooked. Wealthy and powerful men can quite easily find a younger, attractive woman to be there so-called “arm candy”, the tenure of most of these girls is usually quite short and there is always a newer and more intriguing product always coming along. So what is it that makes one woman a Sugarbabe and another a true relationship? The answer is all in what she gives back.

Attractive women are a dime a dozen to the affluent male, but one who understands his needs outside of the bedroom and assists in lessening his burden is worth her weight in gold. Most of the very attractive women who are searching for a Sugardaddie are just asking the question “what can he do me?” There is little support for what this gentleman goes through or how she can assist in a variety of ways especially by being supportive. For a real relationship to develop both parties must understand and believe the other person is supportive of their decisions and goals. Successful men can find sex anywhere but to find a woman who stands by him is rare. We as men understand that you can pretend to be supportive, and that manipulation is merely part of the game most Sugarbabes play in order to get what they want. But we are not always that stupid and do not only think with something other than our brains. Whether it is our career or hobbies or anything else, support of, and motivation to continue those pursuits and possibly even sharing in them, quite frequently turns the short term into the long.

Most successful men are juggling many things at one time, whereas the Sugarbabe may consider scheduling lunch appointments and pedicures to be most overwhelming.  The Sugarbabe can lose sight of the fact that what the wealthy man juggles can have major effects on the future, and a continued affluent lifestyle. It is for these reasons that she not only be supportive in his endeavors, but takes on some of the burden. This can take the form of merely assisting in organizing his down time, which in turn can be used to strengthen their relationship. Countless women fail to remember that building relationships requires both parties to pitch in, and if not providing the wealth she must become part of the foundation that the relationship is built upon.

Being supportive does come with its own perils. First you must determine if the support you offer is genuine or you are just going along with him to avoid rocking the boat. False votes of confidence usually lead to arguments and ultimately to separation. You also must be strong enough to speak your mind honestly, offer support to someone when you sincerely feel the project or endeavor is wrong or unwise is not doing anyone justice. You are there to provide not only support but an honest opinion as well. Again, rich and powerful men really don’t have much trouble finding suitable sexual liaisons, but finding someone who they can trust and open up to while enhancing stability can make a Sugarbaby into a wife

Not everyone is supermodel thin, and the truth is that when the layers of fine clothing and lingerie are peeled away and the make-up is removed, many men are turned off by what is left. Don’t get me wrong, these women are still attractive and enjoy flawless features, but most men seem to prefer dating a woman with a bit more substance. In other words, being a bit overweight is not necessarily a bad thing, but where does average end and obese begin? For the most part, men prefer non-overweight women, but a bit more substance does not mean wearing a belt size that reads “equator”. Just ask any male to tell you about the girl he dreams about and there is a good chance she will not be overweight. When most men are asked to rate a woman, those getting the highest scores are not those that are model thin, but those that fill out their clothes best or have an air of sexual suggestiveness to them.

How a man looks at a woman is very subjective. Most people, when they pass each other on the street or at a favorite nightspot do not first think, “Hey, I bet she has a really nice personality”. It’s much more probable that the first thing that comes to mind is “Holy crap! Look at that ass!” But let’s assume the woman is just about average or a few lbs over that perception. It may take longer to get into a meaningful conversation with that woman, but once and interaction starts, it becomes more about personality and compatibility. At this point men’s perception of a woman’s weight is more about personal taste in regards to the extent of excess body fat.

Peer Pressure actually plays more of a role in a man’s sensitivity of whether or not a woman is overweight than the bathroom scale, as many men do not want to be called a ‘chubby chaser’ by their friends. The overweight prejudice is a relatively recent trend as in centuries past an overweight woman was perceived as more suitable for child bearing. It is only since the media has grown so powerful that such an impact on public perception of weight, that ultra thin models have unfairly become the standard against what all women are measured. It is like saying a man is less of a man because he is short, unfortunately a person cannot get taller, but they can lose weight. Taller and thinner have become what we outwardly notice about others first.

Overweight women do not suffer from a lack of physical intimacy because of their weight; they are just as likely to have as much sex as their thinner counterparts, perhaps even more. Men seem to also truly enjoy the aspects of a relationship that don’t involve sex, such as spending time with someone who has common interests and is easy to talk to. Thin women can have these characteristics as well, but as studies show, thin is usually in the minority!

In all relationships, very rarely is everything perfect and there are always compromises that need to be made. But if you are the kind of person who is always looking for a bigger and better deal, then you may not feel comfortable with a slightly overweight woman. If you are physically not attracted to the woman then you should think twice about getting involved as it is not only going to keep you wondering if you could have done better, but it is certainly not fair to her as well. Remember, there are far more significant factors in life than weight.

The Holiday season is here and time is running out to find the perfect gift for your significant other. We’ve always wondered what gifts women want most for Christmas, so we decided to find out. We surveyed over one thousand women to help uncover what they really want for Christmas!

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The things I wish I knew before I said I do.

I have never been married, and at times I regret this decision while at other times I drop to my knees and say ‘Thank You Lord!’ Its not that I am against the institution of marriage, it is more likely that having seen many friends go through the dating, engagement, marriage and divorce progressions, I am convinced that too many people go into a marriage with either too many regrets or not enough information. I have thus surveyed many of these people to find out what they wish they knew before they took the plunge. Here is what I have discovered.

Marriage is a huge step and although you can’t account for every eventuality such as the raising of children, how your assets and savings will be allocated and what to do if either or both of you fall on hard times. The issue of children and money is probably the number one cause of marital conflict. I feel like if my friends had actually had significant discussions on these topics they either would not have gotten married, or at least had a better idea of what they were getting into, and be better prepared to handle it, both mentally and financially. Don’t get me wrong, there will still be conflict, but it could be lessened considerably by a better understanding of what may lie ahead.

Remember that after you are married you are not just responsible for your own happiness but for that of your spouse as well. You have to be especially certain that the two of you compliment each other in many aspects and that this union makes each of you a better person or more complete. You are giving something up that is very precious, your freedom and it can be very expensive or even impossible to get back. Your dreams are now tied to another person and this person may also have a family that has clear, strong thoughts on how you need to live your life. They will have specific viewpoints on all things including but not limited to religion and the raising of your children. If you are not prepared or uncertain as to whether you can deal with this, runway, immediately.

I have noticed that in most marriages, it is never an equal partnership as one person will either have a much stronger personality than the other or will come into the marriage with significantly greater assets. In most pre-marriage relationships, the person who cares the least usually carries the power, in a marriage the person who controls the bankbook usually does. The stipulation to this is that if one person is much more attractive and desirable, they could have more control as they are more in demand if the marriage fails.

While we’re on the subject lets discuss physical appearance as it pertains to wedded bliss. Very rarely does a relationship last in which one partner is significantly more attractive than the other. This is not to say it doesn’t occur, but more often than not these relationships fail miserably. But in this instance you can make your choices before the rings are on the fingers. What happens if your spouse’s appearance changes dramatically after marriage? The person you fell in love with is no longer that attractive, physical dynamo that you were proud to be seen in public with, but is now an overweight couch potato who makes the bathroom scale shriek every time they get near. You could always get a look at their parents to get a reasonable idea of what you are in for, but the point is to make the decision as to how important looks are during the engagement, not after the wedding.

Chances are you will never change the person you marry, they are who they are and your only choice is whether you can live the rest of your life with these things or not. But again, remember that you have to weigh the emotional cost of getting out of this relationship before getting married or the emotional and financial cost of ending it after you say ‘I do.”