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Have you ever noticed that in every bar in every part of the world, there is always one guy who seems to have the most incredible stories about all the women he has dated and the incredible adventures he has had?  You may look at this man, give him the once over and slap yourself in the head and say “how the heck can he have a date, when I can barely get arrested?”  The answer to this question might be much, much simpler than you could have ever dreamed, to this chap, it’s a numbers game!

What is meant by a numbers game when referring to dating? Well, think about how many times a day a tele-marketer calls your phone and tries to sell you something, or get you to subscribe to a magazine, or even offer you free tickets to a vacation resort, where all you have to do is listen to a slide show presentation touting the great Costa Rican land deal you may be missing? Obviously, they do not expect every phone call to result in a sale, but it may only take one out of every 500 calls to make this venture successful. So it is with the numbers game dater as well.

The numbers game dater may not be the crème of the crop amongst the dating population, but he has something most of the other gentleman looking to date attractive women do not…confidence and a nothing to lose by trying attitude. He knows that if he is persistent, eventually he will come across that one person that will be receptive to his approach or conversation and may actually agree to go out on a date with this person. He may only have a very long string of first dates, but to the numbers game dater, this is all well and good. The attractive, successful man may be fearful of rejection and therefore will only approach those women that he is reasonably sure will be responsive to his offers and therefore his success rate will be very high compared to the numbers method which has a extremely high failure rate.

No matter which technique is used to pursue a date, the ultimate goal must be clearly defined in order to decide, not only the method, but the quarry as well. If all you are looking for is short term companionship, either method may serve you well, however if a long term relationship or potential mate is the essential motive behind this search, than a well thought out plan, including knowing where to look and how to dress and exactly what kind of person you are looking for is in order. The days of singles mingling in the Borsht Belt hotels of the Catskill Mountains are long gone and the era of targeted dating and online dating is well underway!

 

 
For good or bad, texting has become a way of life and it’s probably not going to go away anytime soon. How many times have we been at a restaurant, on a bus, the gym or unfortunately even driving along a freeway or stopped at a traffic light only to see someone hard at work punching the keys of their smart phone to send a message? Texting is a convenient method of interacting with another person without actually having to speak with them.  It’s especially effective if you want to convey a thought without getting into a lengthy discussion on a subject. But, the problem with texting is that the reader will only see words, they really can’t feel the emotional inflections the person texting is projecting.  This can be especially troublesome if this text is of a personal nature and quite often, even with the use of what is called emoticons (little bits of text such as smiley faces) can be misconstrued. For this reason, there are several things that are best left to the voice.

At sleep away camp we used to play a game around the campfire where one person would whisper something into another person’s ear and that person would to the same to another and so on. By the time the message makes it’s way full circle the message has been changed, misinterpreted and convoluted to such a degree that the original message is no longer truly understandable. It’s the same way with texts, the original meaning is never quite as clear as when conveyed by the spoken word and therefore can easily be misconstrued.

So now we know that the written word is subject to interpretation just like when reading a book. If you sit down and read the book you get to put your own spin on things and interpret the book as you see fit.  However, if you are listening to a book on tape you are guided completely by the voice and inflections of the narrator. Its also important to understand that most people texting are going more for speed than accuracy and take many shortcuts that are also not always easily understood. The point is that voice inflections and facial cues play a large part in how we convey information to others. If you want accuracy, speak the words.

Also, depending on how you are texting, you are leaving a word trail as to your feelings at any given point in time. These texts can be used against you later on. It’s a simple thing to cut and paste words from a private means of communication to a blog or face book page which depending on the juiciness of the text can spread like wildfire and make your life uncomfortable for a while. Keep private things private!

I prefer to only text short snippets of information to others, such as a phone number, where I am or when I plan to arrive somewhere. Of course that’s not the only type of information people should text, but you get the idea. Peoples emotions tend to usually get the better of them and if it is an emotionally charged text, don’t count on the recipient comprehending the message that you sent.

Okay, so you’ve been dating for a short while and things seem to be going fairly well; you have dinner a few times a week or go shopping together and it seems that you are actually on the verge of a real honest to God relationship, so what’s next? At this point the two of you should be communicating well and have a good idea of each other’s likes and dislikes yet still have a lot to learn about one another. Many relationships fall apart at this point because those involved get a bit complacent and may even begin to take each other for granted. One way to avoid such problems is to keep things fresh and exciting. There are many ways to accomplish this such as short vacations, special dinners, trips to museums, but although these are great displays of affection, they are not spontaneous and planning needs to go into it to make it successful. It’s amazing how a well thought out small, yet targeted gift can have a greater impact than a dinner or Broadway show.

The fact that it is small and unexpected is only half the importance of giving such a gift, timing and targeting is also important. By timing we are referring to surprise of the gift, not what it is. Let’s assume you are at dinner and have just ordered your appetizers and are discussing a tropical vacation that you’d both like to someday take when you reach into your jacket pocket and display a CD of favorite Island songs that you know he or she will enjoy. This will undoubtedly start a conversation about places the two of you might go together and thereby solidify your relationship even further. A bottle of suntan lotion may even have the same effect! You surprised your partner with not only the unexpectedness of the gift but during a conversation about vacations was perfect timing.

It does take some degree of thought when choosing the right gift or else anyone could just pick up something at the checkout isle of the grocery store and be done with it. This could work on occasion as I have had tremendous results with a mere bag of raisonettes when perfectly timed at a specific few day period of the month. If you know your partner has decided to begin a new fitness regime, a magazine subscription that magically shows up in their mailbox is a great gift. A small stuffed animal left on a desk at work shows not only thoughtfulness but willingness as well since you had to go the extra effort to place it there when he or she wasn’t. If your partner is a candy connoisseur a subscription to a candy of the month club would be a great idea, as would a wine of the month, cheese of the month or anything else of the month, but you get the idea.

Okay, so you are getting the picture now, it does not have to big as long as there is thought put into it and there is a purpose behind it. Flowers, colognes and perfumes are always good ideas but they have lost some of the oomph that they once held, as they are not really all that imaginative. Think about those things that mean a lot to your partner and tie the gift to that. If your partner has a child you can always buy a load of Girl Scout or Cub Scout cookies and have cookie party. The gift need not be directly given to them, lets say your partner is head over heals in love with their dog; showing up at their home with a brand new dog bed or a large meaty bone will surely score huge points with not only them but their beloved pooch as well. Imagination and timing will certainly lead to a much more exiting and hopefully lasting relationship

SugarDaddie.com Delivers Hugh Hefner Birthday Cake to Mansion to Celebrate 87th Birthday

The impression that businessmen such as bankers, lawyers and other successful business professionals are devoid of romantic notions is not only false, it can also be downright insulting. Today’s business executive has many tools at his disposal for creating wealth; he can also use his knowledge of such tools and ideas to create romance as well. A man who can effectively run a large corporation or firm can translate his abilities to advance his social life or relationship too. The following ideas are presented with the purpose of showing such men how to accomplish this.

As a business executive you should have impeccable time management skills, so use this ability to give yourself a bit of added time to spend with that special someone. Telling a woman you are currently too busy to go to dinner or a movie, or anything else that requires a bit of time is basically the same as saying she is not important enough, or she takes a back seat to something else. Not a great way to build a fun and lasting relationship.

If an employee consistently does a great job in your organization you find some way of rewarding them for a job well done, well, the same should go for your romantic partner as well. Just because we call something a raise or a bonus doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to call it that outside of the office. A bonus for making you happy and keeping things under control in your relationship can be something as simple as a surprise day at the spa, or a long weekend trip that you both can enjoy. If you want to take it a step further, give the equivalent of a raise, perhaps an upgrade in vehicles may be in order.  Whatever you decide to do to show your appreciation, it is merely the same as added compensation to a valued employee or partner. Obviously, you are not equating the special person in your life to an employee, but rewards make us all feel good and give us additional incentive to keep working towards a desired goal.

If you are a manufacturer of a product or have a high-end service related business, think about how you treat one of your most valued customers. You would never tell them that you have no time to talk to them on the phone or meet them for a drink to discuss business, so why would you tell your significant other that you do not have the time to meet? Again, this is just telegraphing the message that something else is more important than she. Find, or make the time, even its merely for 1 drink or a stolen kiss in the elevator, that little extra effort can pay huge dividends down the road.

So many Successful businessmen use the time excuse so often that it no longer holds much credibility. If you are willing to work overtime to close a deal why not work overtime for your relationship. Every year right around the holidays or my birthday, my mailbox is inundated with cards and letters from my insurance company, brokerage firm and the guys that detail my car.  They are showing me that I am a valued customer and want to keep my business. I know all their customer’s get the same card, but it still shows me they care enough to send it. It costs a heck of a lot less to keep a customer than to find a new one and the same goes for that special someone in your life. Think about the time and effort of going back into the dating game as opposed to doing the little things that make your current relationship a happy one for both of you. It doesn’t take an MBA to realize that one method is a heck of a lot easier and more cost effective than the other!