One very effective technique which can be of great help when looking to meet people for dating purposes is the proper use of body language. Many individuals seem to underestimate how important body language can be so let’s take a look at how our bodily movements can impact how people perceive us.

We may not be aware of it, but many of us are sending and receiving signals all the time based solely on our physical gestures. Common everyday movements such as the way we walk can send a message to others about our confidence and our mood.  How we read people is about taking these visual cues and decoding them. If you walk with poor posture or sit slouched over at your desk, you are sending a message of low self esteem and laziness. If your goal is to meet people and make a good impression, it is important to walk with your back straight and your head held up and not down.  High heels became a factor in enhancing the body language of women in just this way. Looking downward will send a message that you are either lost or insecure. You might also try walking at a slightly faster pace which will communicate to others that you are important and have places to go.

Whenever you have the opportunity to meet people, it is extremely important to make good eye contact with them. If you’re the type of person who can’t look another individual in the eye, you unknowingly will be sending out a strong message of low self esteem and little confidence.  This can easily be remedied by making sure that you look people directly in the eye but not to the point where it appears you are trying to stare them down.

Something as simple as a smile can make all the difference in the world. In addition to the smile being a key disarming component of the body language of men, Smiling can actually make you more physically attractive and sends a message of warmth, friendliness and happiness.  Whenever you find yourself in a situation where you are about to meet people, be sure to greet them with a genuine smile. A smile costs nothing but its value is priceless!

One thing to avoid doing when in the company of others is to not cross your arms or legs. Doing so will send a message that you are feeling somewhat defensive and distant which can cause people to think you are not interested in them. By not crossing your arms and legs, you will be sending a vibe of openness and friendliness which is like an invitation for people to get to know you better, and done right can be an effective tool for flirting.

A great way to build rapport when meeting is to mimic a person’s movements and postures. Let’s face it we tend to get along better with people who are similar to us. By subtly matching what another person does in terms of postures and gestures, we can create a bond with an individual on a subconscious level. For example if a person is very animated when they express themselves, you should express yourself in a similar fashion. If an individual talks at a fast pace, you might want to talk just as fast or at least avoid speaking slowly. The key for making this effective is to mimic a person’s gestures in a very subtle way that isn’t obvious and you’ll be surprised how quickly an individual will warm up to you.

The most important thing to remember when reading body language is to not underestimate the power of this very meaningful yet silent language. Although there is no app for our phones such as a body language decoder, by being aware of our physical gestures and the gestures and signals of others, we will find that our relationships will suddenly improve and when that happens so does our life!

How To Approach A Woman And Get Noticed

I was sitting with a few friends at my favorite South Beach watering hole the other evening and I watched with amazement the line of guys that approached this small group of women in hopes of catching their attention. Each and every attempt was eerily similar and each ended with the same result, the guy walking away dejected and the ladies barely even remembering his existence. I thought about this for a bit and wondered why these reasonably decent looking guys were failing miserably. Didn’t any of these guys know how to approach a woman at a bar? I watched a few more guys crash and burn and then it hit me when an average looking guy stepped up for his turn, and in a miracle almost as impressive as Moses parting the Red Sea, they invited him to stay for a drink. He did something that none of those before him did, he actually introduced himself and smiled a friendly smile.

So many men waste opportunities by not knowing how to approach women.  They think that merely walking by with a silly grin and muttering something like “Wassup” is all it takes, relying on what they think is their overwhelming good looks to open the door. Having the confidence to approach them is the first part of the equation but not the only part. Confident is good, cocky is not, that is why having something worthwhile or witty to say can make all the difference. Your normal run of the mill or generic pick up lines have been heard many times by an attractive woman, so you need to original and sincere. What always seems to work the best is just saying something like “Hello, I’m <insert your name here>, I hope you’re having a great evening.” Simple, unassuming and combined with a bit of confidence one of the best opening lines ever used. This is time tested whether you are trying to figure out how to approach a woman in the gym, bar or anywhere else.

Of course if you do have a certain charm or wit about you, then you can use that to your advantage by consistently coming up with original opening lines that make people smile. The thing I have noticed most is that very few men actually have the combined skills of confidence and witty dialogue. This can easily be overcome merely by a little practice. This is not rocket science and you really only need a mirror to practice in front of. Another method of practicing the sweet science of dialogue is to just start conversations with those you meet along your day. Mention what a pretty scarf a woman is wearing in the elevator, joke with the elderly man feeding pigeons in the park. Whatever the situation, just start a conversation and in no time at all it will become second nature to you and you will have all the skills needed to talk to approach women with confidence.

Remember that when you do approach a woman you don’t have to recite a novel, sometimes shorter is better. Once the conversation drifts into long pauses it may be time to hasten a strategic retreat. You don’t always need to come away with a phone number or a motel key. You will most likely find that when you do encounter someone you have a comfortable dialogue with, it will more than likely take on a life of it’s own. When that occurs just go with the flow and don’t force anything. Learn how to approach a woman at work to rehearse without getting fired. Just practice and you will find it all gets easier the more time you do it. The butterflies in your stomach may or may not disappear in time, and you will undoubtedly crash and burn a few times. But keep at it, this will not only help you in the dating arena but it’s an important skill for career networking as well.

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If you think about it, most people tend to move towards pleasure and away from pain.  What does this have to do with dating you might ask? Well if you can get a woman to associate feeling pleasure with being with you, then you have a good chance of winning her over. One of the best ways to make any woman feel pleasure is to make her laugh by having a good sense of humor.

Having the ability to make a woman laugh is a sure way to get her to want to be with you. Laughing has a way of making us not only feel good, but it’s actually healthy and can help with lowering blood pressure, boost the immune system and reduce stress.

Many females when asked what they find most attractive about men ranked humor as one of the top 3 qualities a man should have along with confidence and attitude. It’s plain and simple, make a woman laugh and you’re sure to have her falling for you.

You might be wondering if humor is so effective for attracting and dating single women, why doesn’t every guy use it to their advantage? Well for one reason many men are not aware of how powerful a sense of humor can really be. For those men who are aware, some find it difficult to be funny.  Developing the ability to get people to laugh is somewhat of an art because if not done correctly you can come off as sounding quite annoying and silly.

How does a person develop the ability to get people to laugh? Can it be taught or is it something that we are born with? Most likely it’s probably a combination of the two. Some people are just naturally funny but it is quite possible to develop a sense of humor. Learning to be funny can take some work but it will be well worth your time and effort. There are many books available on the subject which can be quite helpful in shaping your new sense of humor.

So the next time you are out on a date with the girl of your dreams, instead of trying to impress her with your knowledge or how important you are, try making her laugh and I’m sure you’ll find her smiling at you all evening long.

Friends are wonderful, they are usually there when you need them, and they can help you with chores such as landscaping, cleaning out the garage or being a sounding board for career decisions when you are considering a new job. Occasionally they will even loan you money, well, that is if they are exceptionally well-off or just stupid, but the one thing you should never do is take advice from a good friend about affairs of the heart! Don’t do it!

Taking dating advice from a friend is tantamount to going shopping for a puppy with any member of the cast of “Survivor”! You may think it’s a fun idea at first but you know as soon as your back is turned that little mut will probable bite you in the ass! You may as well call Charlie Sheen and ask for his relationship opinions while you’re at it. Friends quite often, but not always, have hidden agendas when it comes to dating and relationships, especially when it’s someone else’s relationship. Here are some types of red flags to be on the alert for:

The friend who tells you to “dump him” or her is the one that really gets under my skin, as not only is this person quick to give their advice, but usually does not take the time to ask the pertinent questions about the situation.  Have you ever noticed that this person always seems to be what you felt, was uncomfortably close to your other half, and perhaps always more than willing to be the third wheel when you go out? Do not be surprised that if you break up your ex gives you a ring telling you that “your friend” still calls them or has even asked him or her out!

We now move onto that friend that listens to the entire situation and tells you that everything is going to be fine and you should be happy no matter what, because you are so special and deserve the best. This is also the same person who believes in puppy heaven and the tooth fairy. Dating and relationships are not easy! They require work and people who are too quick to move away from difficult times merely do not care enough to fight for them, or truly understand the situation. This type of friend may not care as much as they claim, they are simply telling you want they think you want to hear in order to stay in your good graces, while also staying within grasp of free entertainment and an occasional free meal.

The next friend is a bit harder to understand. They are the one that wants no part of the current state of affairs; he or she says they do not want to tell you what to do for the simple reason that if you get back together, anything he or she says will be held against them. OK, so they have a point there, if I tell my friend that his girlfriend is a manipulative tramp or has the intellect of an eggplant, I am treading on thin ice. If they get back together, your observations or comments, (even if they were meant only to bolster a friends spirits) will come back to haunt you. This type of friend has a point, you can’t actually blame them, as you are the one putting them in a difficult situation, but as a friend they should take the risk and stand by your side.

Finally we get to what I like to call the “Better with Beer Goggles Friend” this is the friend who follows you like a Remora fish follows a Shark hoping to pick up the table scraps. Its not that they are the second coming of “Medusa” as people do not turn to stone when they go out in public, its just that they would not be your first choice (second or third for that matter) to flirt with in a well lit environment. This type of friend also has ulterior motives due to the fact that your being single gives them a much better chance of finding someone themselves, even if for just that evening!

In conclusion, I am not saying that all friends offering advice have hidden agendas, but you need to take any advice offered with a grain of salt. Remember you are the one that is having the crisis, not them. It all comes down to what you feel is best for you. There are those friends that would jump in front of bus for you, and there are those that secretly would like to be driving that bus. Ultimately, you make the decisions, some of them will be right while others will be painfully wrong. Only time will tell you if the choice was right, but life is what happens while you’re making other plans!